Another awesome post! And Linda since you ask... actually I've made some progress this morning on something which terrifies me and which I need to work through. My edge, as you put it, was there, and I (briefly) stepped beyond it. It's a work in progress, but I feel so proud for today's small step.
A rather edgy topic, Linda, and merits a reply. In a gunnysack I’ll label “stage fright” are some smaller sacks that contain details of shame that arose from both naïveté and thoughtless conduct.
Talking one on one is usually not terrible. Being in a group, strangers or otherwise, I’m petrified to hear my own voice regardless of the topic. I’ve polished possible personas that I believe make me “fit in.” Not so much.
I’ve dipped one toe and then another here on Substack. In doing so I’ve allowed myself to have a voice. Just words I’ve pecked out on the QUERTY keyboard. A different online community I’m able to see avatars of others and hear them speak in real time. Unsurprisingly my avatar has my dog in the foreground, happy as a clam, and I in the background. Or perhaps that one is for another online escape - Twitter? A second avatar is comprised of, yes - Izzie dog, my wife Beth, and I with a purposely ridiculous facial expression.
Have any of these opportunities helped? After countless times watching the avatars and hearing others speak, I decided I had to make an attempt. The feelings that resulted were a flashback to those from my candidacy to become president of the Pennsylvania Junior Historian’s Society. My words came out like frog squeaks. The sizable gathering seemed to react with disbelief. The horror.
Today I feel willingness to speak in the virtual gathering. I think I sound less frightened. I may even feel less so. We’re only as sick as our secrets. I thank you, Linda, for the chance to boot a couple secrets. Carrying less baggage I’ll likely increase my walking pace when Iz and I head out the door.
Wow! Excellent question...I discover so much about myself! What I'm capable of, where I need help, or what isn't working. Thank you Linda. I love that photo of you. Fabulous! Keep going.
Excellent question - and great photo! Miss those 1980's suits - said nobody EVER!
For me - I can't say the risks I've taken have always paid off... but the ones that haven't are the ones I've learned the most from. And it gets easier to recover the older I get.
Another awesome post! And Linda since you ask... actually I've made some progress this morning on something which terrifies me and which I need to work through. My edge, as you put it, was there, and I (briefly) stepped beyond it. It's a work in progress, but I feel so proud for today's small step.
A rather edgy topic, Linda, and merits a reply. In a gunnysack I’ll label “stage fright” are some smaller sacks that contain details of shame that arose from both naïveté and thoughtless conduct.
Talking one on one is usually not terrible. Being in a group, strangers or otherwise, I’m petrified to hear my own voice regardless of the topic. I’ve polished possible personas that I believe make me “fit in.” Not so much.
I’ve dipped one toe and then another here on Substack. In doing so I’ve allowed myself to have a voice. Just words I’ve pecked out on the QUERTY keyboard. A different online community I’m able to see avatars of others and hear them speak in real time. Unsurprisingly my avatar has my dog in the foreground, happy as a clam, and I in the background. Or perhaps that one is for another online escape - Twitter? A second avatar is comprised of, yes - Izzie dog, my wife Beth, and I with a purposely ridiculous facial expression.
Have any of these opportunities helped? After countless times watching the avatars and hearing others speak, I decided I had to make an attempt. The feelings that resulted were a flashback to those from my candidacy to become president of the Pennsylvania Junior Historian’s Society. My words came out like frog squeaks. The sizable gathering seemed to react with disbelief. The horror.
Today I feel willingness to speak in the virtual gathering. I think I sound less frightened. I may even feel less so. We’re only as sick as our secrets. I thank you, Linda, for the chance to boot a couple secrets. Carrying less baggage I’ll likely increase my walking pace when Iz and I head out the door.
All the best in your day today! And always.
Wow! Excellent question...I discover so much about myself! What I'm capable of, where I need help, or what isn't working. Thank you Linda. I love that photo of you. Fabulous! Keep going.
Excellent question - and great photo! Miss those 1980's suits - said nobody EVER!
For me - I can't say the risks I've taken have always paid off... but the ones that haven't are the ones I've learned the most from. And it gets easier to recover the older I get.